Go ahead. Keep staring at me. I'm not moving. I can sit here all day. You have to make me move. I won't do it without you. I honestly don't have a problem being on the couch for days on end. It doesn't bother me at all.
I mean, really! Before this, I was nice and warm and surrounded by friends. And that was after you tried to drown me! Soap in my eyes and constant spinning. Even before that, I was on the floor where you left me after getting home. You wanted something better than me; something softer and less confining. I made you look good that day and you just dropped me like I was nothing.
Well, what goes around comes around, lady! I am just going to annoy you by taking up space on your comfortable couch. Until you decide to put me where I belong, I will be here watching you stare at me. I mean, I can't put myself on the hanger and then hang myself in the closet. I can't fold all my family around me. So I will be here staring right back at you until you get up and do something about me.