Saturday for me #SOL2018 March 10

Sitting on my couch and all I can hear are the wind chimes we bought in Jamaica on our honeymoon nearly 4 years ago and our year old puppy snoring slightly. Wearing sweats and sipping coffee are how I choose to spend my day today. I just want to spend time in the quiet so the tv is off, no music comes from Alexa, and my husband is gone for awhile. I am alone with my thoughts.

Outside it is snowing sideways again. Such a change from yesterday's 55 degree high. I look around and see piles of laundry to wash and fold (I wish clothes folded themselves), piles of jewelry to put away (I take off my pretties when I cook), and piles of writing assessments to score (I wish we didn't have to rate student writing). I know I can't sit and no nothing all day, but it sure would be nice. For now, though, I will relish the silence around me, sip my coffee, and pretend the wind I hear and white I see are ocean breezes and sandy beaches.

Celebration, Devastation, and Acceptance #SOL2018 March 9

Yesterday my first guest blog post was published and I wrapped up my first writing class as the only teacher for a group of educators in my district. Then, I witnessed a former student sign for our local community college to play soccer. I was on a high!

This morning, I opened my email and my high crashed down on top of me. The leader of our local Writing Project emailed to say that because of funding issues, we would not have our summer leadership institute. National Writing Project had their funding slashed which means grant funds don't exist. State help isn't possible because of budget cuts here too. I was shocked. I had to reread the email. I was sure I had read it wrong. Nope. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. I couldn't move. All I could do was stare at my phone as tears pinged off the screen like spring rain drops. Big, fat, never ending. No rainbow at the end of that shower though.

I told my husband. I texted my mom and a friend. They all know how much Writing Project has changed me as a teacher, a friend, a wife, and a writer. They know how much I adore the people in our Writing Project and how much they have supported, challenged, and taught me. They tried to console me; I wasn't ready to be consoled. They tried to make me smile; I didn't want to smile. They told me I would be alright; I didn't know how that would be possible.

All day, I contemplated why this was happening, how to feel, what to do. Writing Project became my second family. Why would the government not fund it? Why isn't everyone as excited about writing as I am? How can I get them to be? I was so sad this morning. By lunch, I was better but still so uncertain. Now, I have accepted it. I reread the email again and saw that there may be a retreat for  teacher consultants. That gives me hope. I also accepted that this may be God's way of helping me to slow down this summer. I will keep writing. I will go on solo writing marathons around my town. I will write in my backyard. I will go camping alone and spend time writing in the mountains. I will work on a new research project on my own. I will share what I learn with my colleagues and my writing tribe. I will be okay, not the same, but okay.

Reflective #SOL2018 March 8

This morning, I woke up pumped to get online. My first ever guest blog post went live at 4:00 MST. It’s not my first blog post, but since I have exactly zero followers, I knew that this post would be more popular than my own. Imagine my excitement as I opened Facebook and Twitter and saw links to it! My heart raced. My hands shook. I clicked on it. There was my name in black and white! I admit, I teared up. Then, I saw that someone had already commented on it! Wow! I felt famous! I returned to Twitter and saw that I had several notifications. My writing tribe was already retweeting the tweet for my guest post. More tears! My smile spread across my face and made my eyes scrunch up until they were slits of light.

Why this excitement? Well, a year ago, there is no way I would have been brave enough to fill out a questionair to be a guest blogger. I wasn’t a writer. I didn’t have anything anyone would want to read so why waste my time. Now, I love to write. I love to blog. I love to share my new found passion. I love to teach teachers and encourage them to become teacher writers with me.

Today is also bittersweet. Six weeks ago, I started teaching a class for people in my school district called “Teacher Writers in a Workshop Model.” Tonight is the last class. I was so nervous to teach teachers at first. Now, I feed off of their energy and I am already thinking about a different class to teach. The teachers seem to be enjoying the class and I am sad to see it end. So, what am I going to do now? I have no idea and I am okay with that!

Considerations (#SOL2018 March 7)

As an educator, I have many hats to wear, but I also have decisions to make on

a second by second basis. Many of those decisions require me to consider what

will happen because of my choices. I can handle those. After all, those are based

on what I decide. However, my decisions also need to be based on considerations

of students.

• Did they get breakfast? Was it healthy? Was it enough?
• Did they have water and heat at home today? Last night? All week?
• Do they have clean clothes?
• Do they have someone to teach them about hygeine? Do they have what they need to get and stay clean?
• Was Dad home last night? Was Mom? Is there a mom or dad in the picture?
• Why was that parent in jail? When will they get out?
• Are the doctors helping? 
• Will the treatment work?
• With her diagnosis, how long does she have left?
• Will his parents stay together?
• How long does his brother have before leaving for the military?
• Were the cops called last night again?
• Whose house was she at last night?

If I don’t take those questions and more into consideration, my decisions will be

meaningless. My students won’t learn because they aren’t ready to learn. They

can’t focus on academics when their lives are in chaos. Every day, each and

every moment, I have to keep my kids and their needs ahead of the curriculum.

My job is to teach my students and some days, that means throwing the lesson

plans out the window and doing something fun or reflective or even just talking

and laughing for awhile. Knowing my students and taking time to consider all

aspects of them makes my decisions the most important ones I make each

and every day.

Incredulous (#SOL March 6, 2018)

Innovative student
Needed excuses to
Cover up
Real reason
Each assignment would not be
Done tomorrow
Until
Looking at the calendar
Only to see
 Understanding dawn that
Saturday was next

High Wind=Power Outage (#SOL2018 day 5)

The wind is howling today. Gusts well over 40mph and sustained winds over 25. We have no windows in our classroom but we can hear the creaking of the skylight when we return from lunch. We work on vocabulary and then read to ourselves. Lights flicker. A couple kids whimper but it’s no big deal. Then, the lights go out. As in total darkness.  Our emergency light comes on and I search for a flashlight. The first one, of course, is dead. I grab another one and instead of students typing their SOL, I grab The Perfect Score and we have extra read aloud time. Reading by flashlight is not easy! Thirty minutes later and still no power. It’s also getting a little chilly. Our STEM lab has windows nearby so we head there, taking our writing with us. SOL posts will have to wait. Students found spots where they can write. I monitor and help as needed.  We are off task but when several classrooms are lining the hallways, what else can be expected? Over 30 more minutes and still no lights. Back to the classroom where we work by the light of iPads. Our emergency light has gone out now too. All after school events are cancelled and teachers are told we can leave when our students are gone. Yippee! Then, 5 minutes before the end of day bell, the lights come on and the heat kicks in. Guess who didn’t get to leave with her kids?

Who am I? (#SOL2018 day 4--late again)

Idea taken from a fellow Slicer and modified for me today

Love it...

Spending time doing absolutely nothing or absolutely everything with my husband

The smell of the mountains in the summer

The sight of our dog and cat learning that the other is not the enemy

Watching the excitement of my students as they read and write something they truly enjoy

Loathe it...

Weather that delays Amazon shipments of new books for me and for my classroom

Not having enough coffee to make it through the day

Figuring out what to have for meals when nothing sounds good

The sound of whining from anyone who isn't trying